Facebook Pet Peeves

For those who don’t know me well in real life, you probably don’t know that I work in social media. Essentially, I get paid to be on Facebook all day. For those who do know me, you know I have these days where I’m entirely too cynical for my own good – today is one of those days.

That said, I see so much crap in social that annoys the living snot out of me every day, that I felt the need to share some of my Facebook pet peeves. We all have them, I just have an abundance, given the amount of time I spend there. So tell me, what are yours? Any in the list below irk you too, or do you have others?

Giving us your daily play-by-play

(8am) Woke up late. Crap! – Shouldn’t you be more worried about getting your ass to work and ensuring you brush your teeth before heading out the door than updating your Facebook status?

(10am) God I love coffee! – Good for you pal. So do I. What about it?

(noon) I want lunch but have no idea where to go. – Is this a poll? Are you asking for suggestions? Because if this is seriously the most important thing you have to post right now you might want to evaluate your situation.

(3pm) Is it 5 o’clock yet? – Nope. You know it’s not. I know it’s not…How about something like “I want to throw a pity party about my miserable job that I think I’m stuck in because I haven’t put in any effort to find a career I enjoy, anyone care to co-miserate?” At least it’s honest.

(3:10pm) Like this if you remember…. Share this if you think these puppies are cute … OMG look at these adorable puppies! – We get it, you’re bored. I like cute puppies just as much as the next guy but that doesn’t mean I’m going to like your picture.

(5pm) FINALLY, time to go home! – See 3pm.

(5:15pm) Going to the gym. Spinning then a back workout. Yeah! – You like to workout, got it.

(5:30pm) Checkin at the gym, just in case you didn’t see that status update.

(7pm) Checkin at Hardee’s. Treating myself! : ) - Didn’t you treat yourself to Dairy Queen yesterday? And I don’t recall a checkin at the gym either.

(tomorrow morning) – I just don’t get why I’m not losing weight. Time for a juice fast. Watch out world I’m going to be a cranky bitch. Maybe that’s because of the “treats?” But I appreciate the warning. *Hide all*

Other annoying, run-of-the-mill updates like: Running errands, I hate technology, going for a walk to clear my head, vacation in 10 days, vacation in 9 days, vacation in 8 days, vacation in 7.5 days, [name] is pooping. [name] is seriously taking a giant dump right now. Ugh- Monday, TGIF!

Okay, so some of those are a stretch, but really people. I think I’d rather know about your bowel movements than some of the other mundane crap you post.

Pictures of your dinner

Are you eating out at a restaurant and getting paid (or at least a free meal) to Tweet/Blog/Facebook about their latest special? No. Didn’t think so. I don’t care what you’re eating. I don’t care how many calories it is or how many minutes you’re going to have to spend on the treadmill to work that shit off – neither does anyone else. Don’t. Just don’t.

Sharing every detail of your children’s lives

Okay, you had a baby, great. Yes, we all want to see pictures of the new little life, but c’mon, I don’t need to hear the disgusting details of poop, vomit, or any other substance coming from the orifices of that child. Find a mommy forum and share away, but not Facebook people – or you’ll be the first person I unsubscribe from. No one needs that shit (literally) in their newsfeed.

And while we’re on the subject, we don’t need to know every ounce your child has gained since it’s conception. Still pregnant? Awesome, show us a picture of you before you pop – that’s fun. Hearing what vegetable your unborn child resembles (in size that is), how about you geotarget those posts to the small town where your parents live and spare the rest of us. I’m not even sure I know how big a rutabaga is…or should be.

Having a profile picture that is of something other than you

Tagging along with the above statement, your profile picture should not be of your child/dog/spouse/car. I make it a point not to accept friend requests of this nature because I don’t know your child/dog/spouse/car. This is YOUR Facebook page, it should be representative of you. Sure, these people/things are part of your life, but they are NOT YOU.

The daily self-portrait

Of course, that doesn’t mean you should get up every morning, grab your phone, stand in front of the mirror or stretch out your arm as far as it will go in front of you and snap a photo to put on Facebook. New outfit, new hair cut/color – whoopie. And for the love of all things holy, do not – I repeat – DO NOT purse your lips in this photo so you look like a duck. What IS that face anyway?!

Passive aggressive crap to get sympathy

“I can’t believe him, what an asshole!”

“So frustrated…”

“Sigh…”

This does not tempt me to ask you what’s wrong. Want to talk? Call me, text me, I’m all ears. But for real, no one wants to be sucked into your drama – well, some do, which is equally sad, but I’m not one of them – so please don’t broadcast it in social.

Discussions with or letters to inannimate objects

Dear Mother Nature – please give us good weather for our wedding/vacation/weekend. I’ll be forever indebted to you.

Monday, you and I are not friends.

So how do you plan to give back to “mother nature” again? Yeah, I’m not friends with Monday either, or any of the other days because they are not human.

Alright, your turn, spill it – I know you have pet peeves too!

Blue Skies!

Ashley

24-hour rule

I have this rule for myself when life just doesn’t seem to be going my way – I call it the 24-hour rule. According to said rule, I allow myself 24 hours to sulk, be upset, pissed off, or whatever other negative emotion I might be experiencing about a situation, and then I force myself to make a plan to get the hell over it.

I’ve been known to press this rule on my friends and family as well. Too often I get invited to pity parties – those things fucking suck – where I immediately present the rule and let them know that I’m happy to support their terrible attitude for the next full day but I expect a plan for how they’re going to move forward tomorrow. Some have fully appreciated this, others don’t take to kindly to my “lack of sensitivity.” But, it’s not for everyone I suppose.

Of course, there are exceptions to this rule – like a death in the family or other devastating news that requires a full-fledged grieving process. I’m talking about your everyday run of the mill issues, like getting a talking to from your boss, or even bigger things like minor car accidents, injuries, even an unexpected change in career path, that inconvenience you and piss you off, but aren’t enough of a travesty to ruin your spirit.

I’m a believer that time heals all wounds, and that most over-reactions in life can be prevented by sleeping on it before taking action – especially on an emotionally charged situation. That said, sometimes it takes a little effort to get yourself back on track.

That’s where the 24-hour rule comes into play.

Give yourself time to grieve, to hate, to cry – whatever you need. But then, make it a point to move on. This timeframe may not work for you, you might need 2 days, a week, whatever, but then find ways to keep your mind productive. Make a plan for getting back on track. Have an injury and can’t do the things you love most? Okay, that sucks, be pissed. Then, figure out how you’re going to spend your recovery time. Read that book you’ve always wanted to read. Take up photography. Volunteer. Push yourself out of your comfort zone so you still know what it’s like to experience living. Whatever it is, do something to get your head out of the negative and be happy with your situation right now. Don’t let life turn you into Debbie Downer, no one wants to surround themselves with that kind of negative energy.

Of course, this is all easier said than done. It takes practice, persistence. You’re still going to have moments of missing whatever it is that was stripped from your life, but if you’re determined to not let the twists and turns of life bring you down, you’ll come out on the other more complete and fulfilled than you could have imagined.

Love and Blue Skies!

Ashley

More time, More money

There’s a saying in skydiving, that’s almost become kind of a joke amongst jumpers, that the key to being a great flyer is more time, more money.

Sadly, this is very, very true. If you have the time to jump as much as possible and the money to invest in coaching and tunnel time, you can become a great skydiver. Of course for most of us, time and money are those precious resources that we just don’t have enough of.

After events like Summerfest where the buzz is about world record attempts and every night you’re seeing video of the progress they are making and you get to be there for the celebration when they finally nail it, you can’t help but want to be that amazing some day so you can be in the middle of that incredible party – to have the pride of knowing you were a part of that and you helped make it happen.

In this community you hear of so many people who “cut away” from the lives that they once knew because they’ve fallen so deeply in love with the sport and want nothing more than to spend the rest of their lives chasing this dream of flight. I think most people who have come into the world of skydiving have at least considered it, if only a fleeting thought.

Then there are those of us who choose to pursue the sport as a weekend warrior of sorts, and consistently struggle to find the balance between wanting to fly, wanting to progress, and wanting to have more outside of the dropzone.

Is there a right way to go about this? As I see it, no. The only right way is the way that’s right for you. Everyone is different. Some people will thrive best by immersing themselves in the sport, finding the best coaches to help them progress and using their savings to pursue this dream. Others, like myself, need a balance. I find that if I spend too much time at the dropzone, in the tunnel, obsessing over skydiving (which, if I’m around it too much it truly does become an obsession for me), I end up frustrated that I don’t have more.

Variety really is the spice of life for me.

But, if I’m completely honest, I do spend part of my days with a bit of envy for those who have taken the risk to find their lives fully immersed in the skydiving community. Those days where I meet jumpers who could teach me a thing or two only to find out they started just last year and have double the jumps I’ve been able to get in my 4 seasons as a skydiver. But, thems the breaks I guess – choosing to have a career, a house, a dog, a bocce team, to be a weekend skydiving warrior – it’s a matter of how you want to live your life. Sure, I want to be an amazing skydiver who gets invited to do things like set records and load organize at events, but at the end of the day, I know I need that balance.

So, as long as you can find the balance that works for you, I believe you’ll find happiness in the sport. Of course, that doesn’t change my desire to have more time and more money to help move my progression along. One day, my skills will get me where I want to go, it just might take a wee bit longer than I’d like.

Love and Blue Skies!

Ashley

Summerfest Recap

“You look tired today…” – the first sign that it was one hell of a Summerfest.

Actually, aside from a really messed up sleep schedule, I walked away from Summerfest feeling great. As you might recall, last year I didn’t stick around the dropzone much after hours given my wingsuit training and all that jazz. But this year, I wanted to make it a point to enjoy Summerfest to the fullest extent, knowing that I had no obligations other than to myself.

I’m going to keep this recap tidy and touch on the main highlights of the weekend before showing you some of the images that made this Summerfest pretty damn amazing.

• 138-way head down world record. No I wasn’t on it, but it was fun to watch from the ground.
• Seeing so many faces I hadn’t seen since last year and getting to catch up with friends I just don’t get to see enough.
• Sit fly. Foot docks. A little bit of head down work. Fun under canopy on a long spot.
• Utilizing long calls during record attempts wisely with some hating. Pink shorts anyone?
• Tiki time!
• Film fest.
• Wasting time and not feeling bad about it.
• UFO jumps, fireworks, watching them blow shit up and drive a car through it! All while having front row seats.
• Letting go, completely, for an entire weekend!

Why I write

A question was posed to me this weekend that got me to thinking about my nature as a writer. The question was related to how I blog – not so much why, but the method behind it. Is there a schedule and how do I make sure to keep it maintained so it’s up and running.

And I don’t think my answer was expected: No plan, it just sort of happens.

There’s not much of a filter between my brain and my fingers when it comes to writing. I typically sit down with a topic in mind and in a matter of 5 to 10 minutes pound out a post and hit publish. It’s not all that methodical.

If I have a random thought when I’m not at my computer that seems like it’ll be a good post, I’ll usually write it down and it may or may not become an actual post, depending on how fleeting the idea. The number of unfinished drafts in WordPress is quite disgusting actually, but sometimes there just isn’t enough to say on a random thought and it turns out that it’s not worth posting about at that time anyway. Or, it may just become a tweet instead. You just have to go with it.

Writing has always been one of my outlets. It’s something I do for myself – which makes blogging easier because I’m not always focused on the end result, I’m not worried about what my audience will think. Sorry guys, much as I love y’all and the feedback I get, I’m in this for myself. Truth is, you make a choice to be here, reading these words. If I think too much about how I come across then my voice will get lost amongst the clearly over thought language.

I’m not one for writing with a plan. Sure, I can do that for work, but I get paid to do that. I’m not getting paid to be here, so I run this show how I see fit – usually by the seat of my pants. That’s the way I write best, spur of the moment while the thoughts are not only fresh, but often still formulating in my head. There’s nothing quite like hearing (or in this case, reading) genuine thought as it’s occurring.

You can’t over think writing, you just have to write. That’s when you get to hear the authors genuine voice and get a little peek into their soul.

That said, I do my fair share of editing. After all, my brain and fingers don’t always align with things like spelling or grammar. The best method is to write, step away for 5 or 10 minutes, read it bottom to top and correct any errors. You’re more likely to catch them when you’re not reading what you just wrote in the order you wrote it – your brain will likely see what it wants to see in that case and you’ll miss corrections – plus it allows you to keep the flow of the writing and not second-guess what you’re putting out there. Well, at least that’s the case for me.

Anyway, this is my day-after-Summerfest post – y’all are lucky you get one at all – stay tuned for more on that.

Blue skies!

Ashley

Jump for Diabetes – Event Recap

About damn time, right? Life has just gotten away from me these past few weeks, so apologies on the late update here.

Just as last year, we’re still awaiting final donations to roll in, so we don’t have a final count on that just yet, but I can say that so far we’ve collected more than $10,000 in donations that will go straight to the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation, earmarked explicitly for research. With the funds still coming in we’re expecting to have somewhere in the neighborhood of $15,000 to donate – well beyond our expectations!

The 4th annual was by far our best year yet, and we’re looking forward to writing that big check and getting a final total for everyone. Stay tuned to the Facebook Page for the final count which we hope to have in the coming weeks.

We want to thank not only our sponsors like Deepseed and Performance Designs, but the skydiving community at large for their generousity. The raffle was a huge hit with more than $15K in skydiving gear and discounts donated. There was a pretty even split in the winnings between jumpers in the South and jumpers in the Midwest – we were happy to have so many amazing prizes to hand out.

There were more pledge jumpers than ever this year, spanning the country from California to the Carolinas. Amazing to see so many jumpers dedicate their weekend to the cause!

This event couldn’t have happened without this community and the love and support of those who stepped up to make the cause a priority in their lives. So many are touched by this disease and it’s with the help of communities like ours that we’ll have the funding to one day find a cure.

I hope everyone enjoys the recap video (below) from the event at Skydive Chicago – I know I enjoyed every moment of this year’s Jump for Diabetes.

Love and Blue Skies!

Ashley

Jump for Diabetes 2012 from Ashley Mead on Vimeo.

So. Much. Love.

As you might be able to tell from the title, this post is going to be a bit sappy / cheesy / whatever word you want to use for someone expressing how grateful they are for the people in their life. So, if you’re not feeling it, you may want to step away now. You have been warned.

—————-

I am completely amazed and humbled by the people I have in my life. Since making the move back to the South, I continue to be surprised by the generosity and love that surrounds me.

In most of the moves I’ve made, it’s been for my career, and often I find myself in cities where I know very few people, if anyone at all. Moving to Atlanta no was different, though I did know plenty of people at my work, and thankfully I have some pretty badass co-workers. But again, I found myself having to navigate a new city, a new dropzone and it was all a bit intimidating.

Thankfully, those who I considered good friends upon my arrival here have proved to be that, and so much more. A close friend and her husband have practically adopted me into their family. We take trips to the dog park (even our dogs are friends) and spend time at their house just shooting the shit. They have gone out of their way to help me get adjusted and I’m eternally grateful to have such generous friends who live right down the street from me.

I truly am blessed to be surrounded by good people day in and day out. I have a handful of amazing friends (which, if you know anything about me, you know that’s all I need to live a happy life, just a handful of people I can count on…it beats having 100 acquaintances that you’re not entirely sure would lend you had hand or an ear in a time of need) who continue to impress me with their love and support. Every week I see my bocce team which is a hodgepodge of different personalities, all of whom have stolen my heart in one way or the other and I not only look forward to our Wednesday games, but often crave the post-game team bonding over drinks and dinner.

And as for skydiving, I continue to be impressed with the community here in the South. So far I’ve only visited two local dropzones, but I’ve been more than welcomed at both and I get to take part in my first Sisters in Skydiving event this weekend at The Farm, which I know will be nothing shy of incredible.

That doesn’t change the fact that Skydive Chicago still holds a VERY special place in my heart. I am so grateful for the experiences I’ve had there – and the ones I will continue to have. Without Skydive Chicago and the amazing individuals I’ve made connections with, I’m not sure I’d have come back to the sport in full force after my hip injury. The community there lifted me up, showed me the way and reminded me of the pure passion I have for the sport. It really is my home DZ in my heart…I am counting down the days till I return for Summerfest!

After Summerfest I get to come back to the South and spend time with a dear friend that I feel so lucky to have known for the last year who will be moving hundreds of miles away to go back to school – but before that we will share some QT in her home town and I’ll get to soak up some of her amazingly positive energy before saying goodbye.

Lately I’ve been hearing from a lot of old friends, some I haven’t conversed with (aside from the occasional Facebook comment) in years, and it’s as if we picked up right where we left off. You know you’ve got true friends when so much time can pass and all you need is a simple phone call to spark the excitement that’s always surrounded the relationship. There are still some friends that I’m trying to wrangle a phone or Skype convo out of – ahem, Brandye, if you’re reading this, we must make this happen – but that’s been the unfortunate story of our post-college friendship that somehow works for us and we too are able to pick up right where we left off, usually with a 2 hour conversation to catch up!

Regardless of where in the world these people in my network reside, I feel the love on a daily basis and am beyond grateful. I often wonder what I did to deserve such wonderful individuals in my life – though I’m not going to spend too much time questioning it. I’d much rather spend that time enjoying their company, smiling and laughing along the way.

Love and blue skies!

Ashley

Deepseed – Skydive Dedicated Hardware

It’s amazing what a high-quality jumpsuit will do for your skydiving.

In recent weeks I received a custom freefly jumpsuit from Deepseed. It’s their Curv8or design for women, and it’s amazing! Moments after my first jump with the suit I was spewing excitement from my face about the smoothness of my flight. I wasn’t fighting with fabric on an ill-fitting jumpsuit, when I decided to make a move, I went there without hesitation. The suit cut through the air like I’d never experienced before.

The thing about freefly suits is that they are supposed to fit a very specific way in order to function properly in a sit (and, if I could stay on my head I’d assume the same for head down). They need to fit close to the body without being tight, and they need to flex in the right places without riding up on the arms or legs.

There are so many features of the suit that I like. You can find the description of all their suits here, but if you want a first-hand account from someone who is absolutely head-over-heels for this suit, then keep reading.

Flexibility

This is first on my list because, from the experiences I’ve had with other suits, this aspect makes the Curv8or stand out from the rest. There are these amazing spandex panels placed strategically throughout the suit that allow it to fit perfectly no matter the position your body may find itself in. The cuffs on the arms stay in place and don’t ride up thanks to these panels, and the spandex on the legs allows me to transition from a sit to stand to shelf and everything in between without encountering too much or not enough fabric to make these moves smoothly.

Fit

Being a New Zealand based company (read: shipping ain’t cheap) I was nervous about the suit fitting right the first time. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard fellow jumpers say they had to send their suits back to “the other guys” because it didn’t come in fitting properly the first time – I’ve even heard stories of multiple resizing efforts to get it right. Yikes! Thankfully, Deepseed has this handy little Measuring School that will walk you through proper measuring to ensure a proper fit. And if they question any of your numbers, they will email you to have you remeasure just in case. They pride themselves on getting it right the first time – so long as you follow the measuring instructions.

Breathability

Living in the South, this is a critical aspect of the suit. There are some days that the last thing I want to do is wear a jumpsuit because it’s so f-ing hot out, but it’s actually pretty comfortable to don this suit. The fabric breathes so you don’t feel like you’re trapped inside a ziplock bag.

Unique Design

They can do everything from color fades to design imprints (read: you can have a logo, text or other image that imprinted directly into the fabric of the suit, so it won’t snag or wear off over time). You can make the suit as basic or as loud as you want.

Guarantee

If the suit doesn’t fit properly, if it didn’t turn out to your specifications or if their stitching isn’t up to par, you have a guarantee that they will fix it for you. Keep in mind, if your suit isn’t rated for the tunnel, that’s not considered “normal wear and tear” but when you’re scoping out options online they explicitly call out which suits are tunnel rated. Be sure to check out the Viper for men and women if tunnel flying is your flavor.

Customer Service

There’s something to be said for a company that will bend over backwards to ensure you are not just happy, but thrilled with their products. Liam, Sally and the rest of the gang are more than willing to work with you on your designs and they’ll even try something new to make sure they have happy customers. I love working with individuals who care!

So, if you’re in need of a new freefly suit, I can’t recommend Deepseed enough. Hit me up with questions if you have them.

Blue skies!

Ashley

Judging

I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to judge others lately and I thought I’d share some of my conclusions. Growing up in small town USA you’re almost brought up to judge the behaviors of others. Typically, we all grow up in similar families where anything that seems “out of the ordinary” is securely locked behind closed doors.

Of course, that was in the 80s.

Fast forward to the 21st century where most of us consume our news online, and even worse, via Facebook, and you can imagine how many skeletons that would have remained in closets are so easily creeping out through the interwebs.

We are all sharers to some degree. We love people to know the positive things that are going on in our lives. Of course, the more you share of yourself, the more challenging it becomes to keep those parts of your life that may not be working out the way you’d prefer, in the dark.

That said – as I know many of you are thinking – everyone has the choice of what they want to share and what they don’t. And yes, I’m in complete agreement with that sentiment. However, if you’ve been putting yourself out there (or, if you have some type of celebrity or athlete status, it’s more likely that others are contributing to putting you out there as well) it can be difficult to shield yourself from public judgment of others.

A great example of this is the recent leak on what goes on in the Olympic Village and the backlash that a lot of athletes are now enduring because of their after-hours activities. Yes, these athletes are best-in-class and should act as such, however, as far as they were concerned, these activities were supposedly taking place in a safe space – where they could unwind. Not all the Olympians are taking part in drunken debauchery as some articles have quoted, but some are. Not all are having sex with every other athlete they find attractive, but some are. Truth is, who are we to judge?

I do agree with some who are saying that these members of society should be the most upstanding that exist – there are kids that look up to them, see them as role models, and for as long as the Olympics has existed, it’s been a badge of honor simply to participate. But does unwinding with some booze and sex in an area that was promised to be a safe haven automatically make them bad people? Maybe that pedestal we put them on was a bit too high, sure, but isn’t that more a product of our starry eyes and our naitivity than their personal actions?

This is, of course, just one example.

Judging others is just something that happens. We all do it. I don’t care who you are and what high horse you think you’re perched on, you do it too. I used to do it ALL. THE. TIME. In fact, it was part of my life that I enjoyed. But, as life throws more experiences at me, I find that when I’m peeking into the lives of others, judgment isn’t something I enjoy. In fact, I find myself thinking things like “dude, 10 years ago I would have thought you were [fill in the blank here depending on the situation],” rather than actually placing judgment in the present. A habit I hope to break, because honestly, it’s still only one notch below actually judging someone’s character.

Judging others based on their choices and actions seems easy to do when you have little life experience of your own. The truth is, cliche as it seems, until you walk even a block in someone else’s shoes you just don’t have the authority to judge their actions. You never know what someone else is going through – I don’t care what rumors you’ve heard, what you’ve seen on Facebook or what you’ve even heard from their friends and family, you are not them, you have not shared their experiences, so you can’t judge their decisions because you just don’t understand.

That said, this doesn’t mean you should walk around in life not passing judgment on others at all. Judgment also helps us determine who we should surround ourselves with on a daily basis. The ability to judge others lets us know when someone doesn’t “feel” right, and choose safe, harmonious communities. Without the ability and decision to judge someone you just might be unknowingly shacking up with a serial killer or an abuser or someone who picks their nose and eats it.

Our wonderful human brain allows us to use this judgment to protect ourselves and those that we love. It’s a trait that continues on in the gene pool because it’s so valuable to the survival of our communities.

What it comes down to, as with most things in life, is self-control. Being the intelligent beings that we are, we’ve realized that we can use this judgment in ways that will unnecessarily alienate others, make them feel bad about themselves, or simply provide fodder for discussions with other members of society (read: “did you see what Jane was doing last night at the bar? She’s such a slut/idiot/drunken whore.”).

When judgment turns into gossip turns into name calling, that’s when it’s time to do some self reflecting and reel it in. Does talking bad about someone else’s decisions make you better than them? Does it make you feel good about yourself to speak badly of another person? What are your motivations when it comes to spreading rumors and talking about someone else?

These are good questions to ask yourself before, during, or even after you’ve judged someone else.

Doesn’t it make more sense to understand before making accusations? Exploring a situation with questions, asking individuals rather than groups, approaching the person himself to find out more information is a great place to start. It might not hurt to ask yourself why you’re exploring for more information in the first place. Do you genuinely care and want to help or are you simply searching for ways to make yourself feel superior to someone else?

Judgement can be a wonderful thing. We were blessed with this ability, but use it wisely my friends, because in the end, prematurely passing judgment doesn’t make the other person look nearly as petty as it makes you look.

Love and blue skies!

Ashley

On making tough decisions

Life is full of decisions. Whether you know it or not, you’re making them every day: everything from how many times to hit the snooze button, to the type of creamer you’re going to put in your coffee, to the time you decide to go to bed.

These don’t seem like decisions, however, because most often when someone refers to a “decision” it’s because it’s a pretty big deal (and you know, worth talking about, because no one else really cares how many times you hit snooze yesterday).

It’s the big decisions, those that have the ability to change the course of our life, that stand out most. They take time and energy to make. Knowing a decision has the potential to change your life, there may even be rounds of deliberation with friends to help solidify your thoughts.

What I’ve found, though, is that often, whether people know it or not, these seemingly tough decisions really aren’t all that hard to make – it’s the action to move forward with the decision that becomes the challenge. When I speak with friends who want advice, by the time they get to me, I can usually tell that they’ve already made up their mind but are simply having a hard time taking that first step in the right direction. It’s like they have come to a fork in the road, know they want to veer left, but it’s such a different path than the one they were just on, they need to stop and reflect before they can proceed.

When I see this happen with others, I truly appreciate the process they’re going through. I’ve been there myself on a number of occasions, and the theme tends to be the same: decision time, gut tells you one thing, head may or may not tell you another, you know to follow your gut and a period of waiting happens – whether mere minutes or even months – there’s typically a period of hesitation when it comes to acting…especially if your decision impacts other people.

As a skydiver, I have learned that sometimes you can’t follow logic, you can’t make a decision based on what the butterflies in your stomach are telling you. Rather, decisions based on a feeling, a sense that this is just something you should do, often ends up being the right path. The truth is, whatever road you travel, there will be positive and negative outcomes along the way – that’s just called life. The real challenge is making the choice to focus on the positive, find the good in the bad, learn from the hardships and apply those to the rest of your life so you can truly live the life you’ve always dreamed.

Still stuck on a tough decision? I can promise you the answer isn’t in that self-help book, it’s not what your friends or family think is best, it’s what your gut is telling you. Quiet your mind, find a place to be alone and really listen – you’ll find the answer, and the strength to make all your dreams come true. Have patience with yourself, take the time you need and act. In the end, the path to the left isn’t all that scary after all.

Love and blue skies!

Ashley